Reality Is Beginning To Set In...

Well, reality is starting to set in. I think that I am truly beginning to wrap my mind around the idea that we will be moving, and for the first time, I am starting to understand how hard this is going to be. Today after church we had a graduation/going away dinner for Karen and I. It was such a wonderful heartwarming experience, but it was also much harder than I thought it would be to begin the process of saying goodbye to everyone.

Karen and I were talking this afternoon that we have lived in this general area since 1988. Our kids have grown up here, and although we relocated a few miles away when I entered ministry, in reality, we were still very close to the place we started. This afternoon we traveled down to Corydon IN (where we are moving to) and drove around and spent a little time getting familiar with the area. Even though we are excited about the possibilities and are looking forward to our new ministry, for the first time, I understand how difficult it will be to leave the old ministry.

I guess that the reality is that we have grown to love these people and they have grown to love us, and even though we all knew that this day would come, it seems to have hit everyone rather hard and perhaps a little unexpectedly, if that makes sense at all.

As we begin the preparations to move, I know that I am going to be asking God for a little extra help and assurance for both Karen and I, as well as for our congregations. The next 30 days will be difficult.

Blessings:)

The House Didn't Fall On Me...

These past few weeks have been a whirlwind of activity. I didn’t think that it was possible to be busier than I was in Seminary. It certainly is a good thing that I am finished with school or I really would be in trouble. Throughout the past four years, I always thought that it felt like I was living two different lives, my life over at seminary and then my life at home serving my churches. But even with the completion of school, I can’t seem to get past that sensation.

In the past few days I have continued to lead a dual existence, I have been both busy working to prepare my churches here for my departure and also beginning to work with my new churches to prepare for my arrival. It seems that there are so many details to take care of, what color to paint my office, what movers to select, finding out what day we will be moving, and of course packing up all of this stuff.

Then again, we can’t forget that there is still the regular work of the church to do such as Wednesday night community dinner, sermons to prepare, bulletins to finish etc.

So, for the time being, I will continue to lead this dual existence, knowing that God is in this process, and even though I don’t know the outcome of the events that lie before me, I can rest assured in the knowledge that God is surely present here in Crothersville as well as already firmly in place in Corydon preparing for our ministry there.

Blessings

Gone but not forgotten...

I thought I would let you know that I will be gone for a couple of days. I am leaving this afternoon to go to the Lake Placid Conference Center in Hartford City, IN to attend my first Residency in Ministry (RIM) Retreat. I will be participating in this program for the next 3 years as I work toward ordination. It should be an interesting retreat, but I am a little concerned to find out that we will be working on the demolition of some blighted houses in the area. Hmmmm, Jim and hard manual labor? Those two don't go together very well. I hope I survive:)

I will let you know when I return on Wednesday, or if I don't return then you will know that I either had a heart attack in the heat, or the house collapsed on top of me:)

Blessings:)

Big Announcement!

Yesterday was another one of those mixed emotion days. First of all let me share with you the news about our future. It seems to me like every aspect of our future has been so uncertain for such a long time that it feels a little strange to at least have some glimpse into where we will be going and what we might be doing.

Thursday evening we met with our new District Superintendent who took us to meet the Pastor Parish Committee of our new churches. It has now officially been announced that I will be receiving a new appointment. Effective July 1st, we will be moving to Corydon, IN to begin serving the 2 point charge of Oak Grove United Methodist and Fountain United Methodist Church. I must say that we were greeted so warmly and hospitably by everyone that we met, and I would especially like to mention that the outgoing pastor, who will be moving up near Connersville, IN, (much closer to her children) was so very warm and kind to us. I am very much looking forward to beginning life as a full time pastor.

Yesterday was also my graduation party. What a wonderful time we had! It was so good to see so many people come out to offer their support and congratulations, and I can honestly say that this journey through seminary was the most difficult and intense thing that I have ever done. As I look back on my life, I have always considered Chiropractic College and getting my pilot's licenses as my 2 most difficult accomplishments, but I now believe that seminary far surpasses either of those efforts, and in addition, I can honestly say that this is the accomplishment that I am most proud of. However, with that being said, I did not do this alone. It took a major effort from my churches, my family, and my friends to get me over the finish line, and I am so blessed by everyone who has had a part in this accomplishment.

My mentor Ron once told me that one day when I am kneeling before the Bishop preparing to be ordained, I will come to the realization that I could not have possibly gotten there on my own. Well, I don’t have to wait that long. I know now that God has been with me every step of the way, sometimes pushing me, sometimes pulling me and often times carrying me. I have always heard it said that the work of the Holy Spirit is best seen looking back through the rearview mirror. As I pause now in this time of transition, the only thing in the rearview mirror that I can see is the work of God at every juncture, turn, crossroads and even in what I at the time considered roadblocks. God is indeed good all the time!

The sad aspect of these past few days is realizing that there are a number of people at seminary that I will likely never see again. I know that we say that we will keep in touch, but as my children reminded me that this is my fourth graduation and so with that experience, I think that I can speak with a little historical perspective. As we move on, even with the greatest of intentions, most often we get so busy that it becomes difficult to maintain the old relationships. The feelings are always there, the relationships are still intact, however, they aren’t the close daily and weekly relationships that they once were and I find that sad.

I am also starting to reflect on my time with Crothersville and Cana and I also know that these relationships will change as well. I know that I will always love these people and I know that they love me as well, but moving forward in ministry is what the United Methodist Church does. Someone new will come in with strengths that I didn’t have and allow the churches to grow in ways that I simply wasn’t capable of doing. God has given each person a set of gifts and it is up to us to use those gifts to build each other up and to help build God’s kingdom.

These past 4 1/2 years serving Crothersville and Cana UMC's has been such a blessing to me and I am so grateful for every moment. The next few weeks will be spent reflecting upon what we have been able to do together and also to prepare for the ministry that will lie ahead both for the churches and also for me. This truly is a day of new beginnings.

Blessings

Waiting for Normal to Return...

I just have a few minutes this morning to hit the highlights of the past few days before heading off to church. On Friday, Karen, Ben, Crystal, Andrew and Mary headed off to that distant land of Ohio for one last time. We truly had a wonderful trip over, and once we got to the hotel we had an awesome time relaxing in the pool and hot tub prior to the Baccalaureate Service. Terri was able to join us a little bit latter, just in time for a late evening trip to White Castles.

The graduation on Saturday was a very memorable experience and then after lunch at Damon’s with the whole crew, which happens to also be the very first place that Karen and I ate on our first trip to Ohio all of those many years ago, we journeyed back home to Indiana.

Today will be a big day as well. After the worship services this morning, where we will finally get to make the big announcement about our future, which seems like it has been in limbo forever, we will then prepare for my graduation party this afternoon.

But then there won’t be any rest for the weary, because Monday, I have to go up somewhere in Northern Indiana for the 3 day Residence in Ministry retreat, (RIM) which I will be participating in over the next 3 years up until Ordination.

Well, I am just about out of time here this morning. I could have filled an entire post on any one of these topics, but for now I thought I would just bring you up to date. Next time I will fill you all in on the Big Announcement!

Blessings

Heading Back to Ohio!

I'm heading to Ohio for Graduation, See you all when we return!
Blessings!

You Are Never Going To Believe What I Did :(

Ohhhh Nooooo You are not going to believe this! I am so upset with myself right now! Do you know what grade I got in my Foucault class that I have been ranting about for the past 4 months?

Wait a minute, before I tell you my grade let me first share with you the comments that I received on my final paper and effort in class:

“Your paper is so very well conceived, and demonstrates a clear understanding not only of the kinds of questions that Foucault wanted people in contemporary societies to be asking about our "normal" social arrangements, but also of what kinds of things Foucault thought was at stake in insisting on asking these difficult and unpopular questions. Especially considering that this was your final semester of seminary and you have no doubt been struggling against "senioritis," you have done a really fine job all semester long.”

Ok, here is the bad news. I got an “A” for the course :(

Isn’t that awful? I am so angry with myself.

Now admittedly, you might be asking yourself, why would I possibly be angry and upset about an “A” But, if you remember our previous conversations, I took this class pass/fail because I was actually concerned that I might not even be able to pass and I didn't want this grade dragging down my grade point average. So now I realize that I have worked about 2 grade levels higher and harder than I needed to all semester long, and for a classic under-achiever/procrastinator like me, only now, in the end, when it is too late, I realize I could have gotten by doing so much less :)

Oh Ok, I guess I did learn a tremendous amount about philosophy and ethics, and yes I have grown to have a great deal of respect for Michel Foucault when four months ago I had never even heard of him before, and oh ok, I guess I do have to admit that despite my ranting and raving, I really did enjoyed the class, and yes, I guess that there could be something said for doing your best all the time and in all circumstances, and now that you mention it, I wouldn’t have wanted to give any less in that class than my best effort, and yes, I know, grades really don’t matter, and oh yeah, I do remember that in Chiropractic College I would have given anything for an A even if it didn’t count. Ok, Ok You made your point, I'll quit complaining!

But couldn’t she have just given me a “B” it would have saved me all of this anguish:)

Blessings to you and only 3 more days to graduation! Whoo hoooo

No More Foucault... What Am I To Do?

I have to admit that my eyes are very weary tonight. It has been a very hectic but still a good day. The first news of significance is that I finally hit the send button on my last paper for seminary. And I think that I did an excellent job if I do say so myself. Of course the professor may have something to say about that, but since the class is pass fail, I think that I am in pretty good shape.

I also have some new news to share with you about my future, but for now, I am not in a position to give you any details. But when I can, I certainly have some stories to tell you:) (Don't you hate it when people say, Guess what... I can't tell you? :)

Tomorrow I have to pretty much get Sunday’s Worship services ready to go because I will be in Ohio for Graduation on Friday and Saturday, so if I am not ready by Thursday, I could be in trouble.

I hope that your weather has been as beautiful where you are as it has been here in Indiana! I am feeling very blessed right now :)
Blessings

Never a Dull Moment...

Yesterday was a very special day. I had the opportunity to go back to my home church, which just doesn’t happen as frequently as I would like, and see everybody again. The purpose for this trip was to recognize my graduation from seminary and also to share with them my experiences in El Salvador.

Even though I knew that this presentation was coming up, I didn’t really start putting the nuts and bolts of it together until Saturday. (I know, I was procrastinating again) Unfortunately, I ran into technical difficulties, and nothing was working like I had hoped that it would. Finally, after a complete change of plan, an unexpected trip to Staples and trying my hand at putting together my first Power Point presentation, at 10:00 Saturday night I was finally ready.

Although, I used to have a problem with running on time, in the past few years I have improved dramatically, as a matter of fact, I have turned into my mother and tend to get to places a half hour early. Unfortunately, Sunday wasn’t one of those days, I was held up a little bit at Cana after the service and ended up being late to my own party. How sad is that?

However, everything was forgiven and of course the meal was excellent and my presentation went very well. This technology stuff is pretty cool when it works like it is supposed to:) Of course, Ben was disappointed that I didn’t begin to tap all of the resources and bells and whistles available in Power Point, but I was just glad that I figured out how to turn it on.

What was most remarkable for me was to discover the extent that my journey to El Salvador still affects my feelings and emotions. I found it incredibly difficult to talk about certain aspects of the trip, especially my experiences in El Mozote. I wonder how long it will take to get past these feelings? Do I even want to put them behind me?

This is the beginning of a fun week, finishing this Foucault paper, trips to the dentist, last trip to Ohio for Graduation, Pastor Parish meeting with the District Superintendent… Should make for an interesting week:)

Blessings

I'll put it on my list...

I love to make lists. I am not sure what I would do without my ever present list of things to do. I have even been known to get something done only to discover that it wasn’t on my list to begin with so I will go ahead, write it on my list just for the joy of checking it off. Well, yesterday was one of those days where I was able to check several things off my list. There have been a few things hanging over my head that I have needed to finish for quite some time, but there always seemed to be something more pressing to get done, like seminary for instance :) Of course when one is a procrastinator like I am, that always means that there are many, many things on your list to get done which can be a blessing and a curse.

So today, my hope is that I can keep up the good work, I still have a couple of major things to get done in the next few of days. I need to finish the paper for my Foucault class (no I’m not done with it yet, it isn’t officially due until Wednesday:) And, I have a presentation on my trip to El Salvador to give up at Trinity UMC on Sunday that I need to get the pictures in order and ready for. Other than that, and the trip to the dentist, it today should be a pretty laid back day.

Blessings

Mixed Emotions

Today is very much a day of mixed emotions. I have completed my last trip to Ohio (except for graduation) and now I have a weeks worth of work to get done today. I really don’t know what to say about being finished with seminary. There is a part of me that is ecstatic. I can’t believe that it is actually finished. As I look back, in one way, these four years have seemed like a lifetime. I almost don’t remember what my life was like prior to seminary. But in an equally puzzling way, it seems like it was only yesterday that I sat in the orientation, thinking that there would be no way possible that I would be able to get through all of the mental, spiritual and emotional challenges standing between me and a Master of Divinity Degree. But none-the-less, here I am!

I had an opportunity to sit down and talk to President Jay Rundell yesterday for about a half hour, and I shared with him my two greatest fears entering seminary. The first was that I wouldn’t be able to keep up with the academic work. It had been 25 years since I had been in school and too be honest, I wasn’t all that great of a student back then. The other fear was that I would be totally out of place with all of those young fresh faced “kids” that I saw walking around on campus. But, four years later, I look back and see that both of those fears were unfounded. I will graduate with a grade point average just above a 3.5 which is an A, and I now realize that the interaction that I had with all of those young (and not so young) students will be what I will forever cherish most about my time in seminary.

My guess is that you will hear more of these reflections over the next several days. I am only now beginning to process what this experience has meant to me, so as I figure it out I will let you know.

Oh, and as for my tooth, I have only had a few times where I was pretty miserable, but for the most part the discomfort has stayed to a low consistent aggravation. Today I have to pack in a weeks worth of work because tomorrow morning I have to get that tooth pulled, and I am a little concerned about how well I will feel when I get done. Maybe, I will feel fine and I can get right back to work, I certainly have enough that needs to get done. But if not, Sunday’s sermon may become a hymn sing, led by somone else :)

Blessings

Where Have You Been???

I have to apologize, this is about as long as I have ever gone without posting on my blog. This has been an incredibly busy last few days as I have been trying to get everything done for school as well as plan for our Mothers Day Banquet and prepare for the special services last Sunday for Mothers Day. In addition, I developed a pretty significant pain in one of my teeth and ended up going to the dentist on Friday. After examining me, the dentist told me that he would have to pull the tooth which didn’t make me especially happy. They sent me home with some pain medication and antibiotics and said that they would try to get me back in on Saturday to pull it. Late Saturday morning they finally called, but by then I was full blown into trying to get ready for the Mothers Day Banquet, and besides the pain had calmed down to a mild roar, so I hoped to put off the pain of getting it pulled a little longer.

So this morning I called back to get my appointment scheduled and I decided that I would try to make it until Friday. I figured, today, I would finish my final paper for Evangelism, tomorrow and Wednesday I will be in Ohio and I hope to get the majority of my final Ethics paper finished by then. Thursday, I plan to get ready for Sunday services and finish my Ethics paper and then Friday get my tooth pulled. Saturday I can plan to lay around in pain all day (I hope that isn’t the case) and then Sunday preach 2 sermons and then give a presentation to my home church on my trip to El Salvador. I just don’t have time to be down, so if I am going to feel bad, it can only be between the hours of 10:00 AM on Friday and 8:00 AM on Sunday. Now I just hope that the pain medication keeps me going until Friday. I will let you know how that part of my plan works out:)

For now, I am heading to bed, and tomorrow morning I will be on my way to Ohio at 7:15 AM.

Blessings

National Day of Prayer

Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

A Cluttered Mind is a Terrible Thing to Waste...

I am sure that you have heard the expression that a cluttered desk is indicative of a cluttered mind. Well, if that is the case I’m afraid that my mind is ultracluttered. When I got home from Ohio last night, I went into my office and picked up the mail, which is always placed neatly on my office chair, but when I went to put it on my desk, I discovered that there was no longer any place to put it. The stacks have now covered my desk to the point that I only have enough room for my mouse. (Actually the mouse pad is beginning to get shoved off the edge of my desk.) It’s a good thing that my keyboard is in a drawer under my desk, or I wouldn’t be able to type.

So what does it mean that my mind is so cluttered? Is it cluttered with good things, or am I just that woefully behind on everything that has found it’s way to my desk without any hope of being resurrected? Well, today I am going to find out the answer to that question. My goal is to find out what is on the bottom of those stacks and to begin the task of uncluttering my desk.

So, with that in mind, it does force me to ask the obvious question; if my desk gets uncluttered will that mean that my mind won’t be cluttered anymore? I didn’t think so either :)
Blessings

I Have My Work Cut Out For Me...

I have come to a very scary revelation. It is going to take me the next 25 years to even begin to digest and process what I have learned in these past four years of seminary. As I was sitting in my Foucault class this afternoon doing everything that I could to simply keep my mouth shut and not weigh into a conversation that could only end up badly for me. I realized that I can not simply dismiss many of these ideas that I have disagreed with on such a gut level. I don’t think that I will ever reach a point where I am in agreement, but I think that it will be critical for my ministry to try to understand where these ideas have come from and at the very least to understand the needs and desire of the people who express them.

I believe that we are all interconnected. What I do affects you and what you do affects me. No mater how hard I may try to understand some of the ideas that I hear expressed by my colleagues, I can’t get past this basic idea that we are all a part of something much bigger and if I do something harmful to myself or to my relationships with others, those actions will have a ripple effect that will impact many more people and ultimately society.

Take a popular television program like The Bachelor for instance. It could be argued that it is just a television show, and that it is simply a form of entertainment, but I can’t help but see the way that it denigrates the relationship between two people and reduces love, commitment and ultimately marriage to the level of a game show. I struggle to see how this could possibly have any form of positive impact on society. But then I have to step back and ask the question, how did we get here? Was a program like The Dating Game that I watched as a child preparing our society to accept a program like The Bachelor? If so, what will be the next step beyond The Bachelor? I mean the divorce rate is already above 50%, how much worse can it get? Do we ultimately do away with marriage all together?

Are we reaching a point in society where our relationships with each other are becoming so shallow that we will allow "America" to vote online and decide who we should pick to “hook-up” with? Perhaps that will be the next generation of Facebook, “Pick the top 5 girls/guys I should be with.” Notice I didn’t say marry, I’m really afraid that marriage itself may be a dying institution. This whole idea of Facebook just seems to keep people at a distance. Oh sure I know what time people get up, what they had for breakfast, and what they are doing today, but that just gives me the illusion that I know them, I am only learning what they want me to know which may give the impression that I know them, but the reality is often quite different.

I am very concerned about our ability to really connect with each other on a deep personal level. In my lifetime I have seen a tremendous change in how we define a traditional family, marriage and personal relationships. These changes, I believe, will only become more and more profound in the foreseeable future. How do we respond to these changes? How do we as a society negotiate this new world? How do we mourn the loss of these things that we have held so dear while seeking to look forward and embrace the future? I think that I will definitely have my work cut out for me over the next 25 years figuring this all out.

Blessings

A Month to Remember...

This week marks the beginning of a very hectic month. I have 19 more days remaining until graduation, but only 9 more days left until my last class and the completion of all of my course work. This Saturday is our Mother Daughter Banquet at church and Karen and I will be doing most all of the preparations for that, although we are very much looking forward to it. I have arranged to have a guest speaker come and talk to the ladies, which I am very anxious to hear. I won’t say who she is, but I have wanted to have this conversation in the church since I was appointed to Crothersville/Cana four years ago, so I hope that it will be a blessing to everyone.

On Sunday the 17th I have been invited to go to my home church, Trinity, and give a presentation on my trip to El Salvador, so I am looking forward to seeing everyone again and to especially have the chance to thank them for their significant role in my being able to complete seminary.

Then, of course, the following Friday, I will be journeying back over to MTSO for Friday’s graduation rehearsal as well as the Baccalaureate Service Friday evening. All of the kids are planning to come as well, and we will be staying over night and then attending the graduation festivities on Saturday morning. I think that this will be a time of mixed emotions. I have been though graduations a few times now and I know that this will be the last time that I see some of these people, so that will make for a bit of sadness in what will otherwise be a wonderful day.

Sunday the kids are planning a party for me between 4:00 and 6:00 PM at the Fellowship Hall of Crothersville UMC. Everyone is invited:) And I am looking forward to having an opportunity to thank all of the people who have been so instrumental in my ministry.

Monday afternoon following graduation, I then leave for 3 days to begin the RIM, Residence in Ministry Program, which will be the program that will keep me busy over the next 3 years as I continue down the path to Ordination. I have no idea yet where I will be spending those 3 days or what we will be doing, but for now, I am just grateful to be on the list, so I will just do what the Bishop and Board of Ordained Ministry tells me to do.

So that is pretty much my month of May. I am sure that there are surprises and a lot of unexpected things that will be happening this month. But regardless, it will certainly go down as a month to remember!

Blessings

May is a Memorable Month!

The month of May has always been a memorable month throughout my life. There have been some pretty great and memorable events such as graduations, concerts, recitals and a number of other things that will forever be a part of who I am. The awesome thing is that there are several events coming up for me in the next few weeks that are sure to add to the treasure trove of memories that I already have in the month of May.

But as I sit here this evening, the night before the Kentucky Derby (which is a big event around here) I can’t help but think about what happened in my family exactly 36 years ago tonight. This was the night of the annual talent program at my High School in Moline, Illinois, although I was still in Junior High at the time. My sister, who was three years ahead of me in school had tickets that she had received from a good friend of hers (who I wasn’t quite sure could be trusted) and for some reason, I was elected to go with her to the program. I could tell you that I didn’t want to go, and that I was dragged kicking and screaming, but, to be quite honest, after all these years I couldn’t tell you if I wanted to go or not. All I knew is that we were there.

Sometime in the middle of the program, there was an announcement made over the PA system for Jim and Verna Higdon to come to the ticket counter. I was immediately angry, I was just positive that there must have been some type of problem with the tickets that her friend had given her, and that we were being kicked out of the program.

However, when we arrived at the ticket counter our parents were there to pick us up, apparently my brother, who was 20 years older than me and living in Atlanta, had been on his way up to visit us on his motorcycle when it broke down on him in Louisville, KY. That’s correct, on the night before the Kentucky Derby. (I still had my doubts about the validity of our tickets)

So we all jumped into our van and began the almost 8 hour trip to Louisville to pick him up. Dad drove all night, and just as the sun was dawning on Kentucky Derby day, we arrived in Louisville to find my brother camped out behind a filling station, all ready to load up his bike in the back of the van and head for home.

That night has been a memory that has stuck with me all of these years and other than my concerns about whether or not our tickets were valid (do you get the feeling that this could still be an issue for me?) This was, for me, an excellent example of our families care and concern for each other. My parents never hesitated, they didn’t argue, they didn’t debate the various options that they had available, they simply did what they had to do to take care of one of their kids, even though my brother was a really old man of 35 at the time :) As I reflect back on that experience, I will always remember the love that my parents had for each of us and their willingness to sacrifice for us without hesitation.

This is also a reminder to me of the love that God has for each of his children. For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. I am indeed blessed!