As I sit here this evening pondering the past few days, I want to apologize for my last couple of posts. I have begun to realize that this health care debate has opened up some very deep wounds that I thought were basically buried or at least forgotten. I realize now that this just isn’t so. I know that I have shared with you that seminary was a wonderful and meaningful experience where I was challenged, and blessed with viewing the world from a multitude of perspectives. It was also a very painful time where I was often forced into positions of wanting to rebel with every fiber of my being but being unable to even speak out because of the risk of alienating myself from fellow classmates and more importantly from those in power who held certain things like grades over my head.
I still remember one sermon in homiletics class where I gave what I would consider a main stream sermon, but was ultimately chastised by both my classmates and professor for a conservative theology that they didn’t agree with. The result? I received a “B” on that sermon. It was funny that the next time, I gave a sermon that I knew was “acceptable” theologically and of course that was an “A.” I’m not stupid, I learned pretty quick what to say and what not to.
Why do I tell you this? Because I know that my rebelling against this health care debate and the anger in my words is centered 100% in the anger that I felt being marginalized and unable to speak out over the past four years.
So what do I do? I’m not sure. I guess I am most troubled by some of my “friends” on Facebook. Until today, I don’t think that I have ever said anything political or in anger on Facebook (I know, you will say that I save it all for you:) But some of my “friends” post articles and comments on almost a daily basis that to me (as a conservative) are totally unfair, derogatory, sometimes nasty, and frequently untrue.
The problem is that I don’t even think that they realize it. I would love to ask them what they would think if I decided to start posting thoughts or articles from Rush Limbaugh or Conservative Christian voices. I am sure that they would find these as annoying and irritating as I find theirs. The difference is, that I would never do that. I try as hard as possible to be positive, lifting up good things, sharing life and ministry, but admittedly my posts on Facebook have been fewer and farther between because I almost dread going on there because I know what I am going to see.
So here I am, I don’t want to go off Facebook completely because I have a lot of family and people that I really care about on there. Some of you are reading this right now, and chances are if you are reading this you are not one of those people that I am talking about:) (They don’t even know I have a blog, or care for that matter)
So what do I do? Go off Facebook all together? De-friend people? (I don’t want to do that) Just keep my mouth shut and head down? (I am pretty good at that most of the time) Continue to be angry? (I really hate feeling like this) Let these friends know that they have a much larger audience than just fellow liberals and that they could be a little more sensitive to other peoples thoughts and feelings? (would they even care?)
I think that I will just stay away from Facebook for a few days, chill out, and remember why God put me here to begin with, and I assure you that it wasn’t to argue over health care.
Blessings
Another Trip Around the Sun
4 years ago
9 comments:
Hi Jim, you don't have to defriend those people. Just "hide" them and then you won't get their posts unless you want to go in and look. You will still see the people you want to stay in touch with. Just a thought. I know where you are coming from though. Not so much on Facebook but in general. judy
Judy:)
You always seem to have the right advice at the right time! Thank-you! You seem to know instinctively what I need to hear or at other times what I should hear! For someone I didn't even know a year ago, you have been so incredibly instrumental in my journey and for that I am always grateful!
Thank you Jim, peace :)
Hi Jim,
While I don't agree with everything you wrote about the healthcare issue in your blog, I appreciate your honesty and am still reading your blog! As a "middle of the road" person -- theologically and politically -- I have become increasingly frustrated with the polarization in our culture. We (humanity in general) take sides for sides' sake and start the mudslinging without really listening to each other. This is certainly not God's intention for Creation. Please don't defriend people on facebook (especially me!). I think it is a great avenue for connection and communication, and even if we don't agree, we can agree to disagree. Take care, my friend.
Jim, I know I'm one of the people who has upset you and I'm sorry that it is making it hard for you to Facebook. I'd like to share with you how I handle the issue of differing political/theological opinions. This is simply my way, not THE way or the "best" way.
I have many conservative friends on Facebook who post articles I know I won't agree with so I just don't read those posts. We don't talk politics face-to-face because we disagree so we don't read each others article posts either. We recognize each other's right to publicly express their opinion while at the same time avoiding tension by not reading stuff we know we won't agree with.
I have many friends who disagree with me politically and theologically. I choose not to surround myself only with people who think like me, I enjoy diversity. I ignore the posts I'm not interested in and enjoy all the other posts. I don't know if that solution is desirable for you.
If you choose to unfriend me on Facebook because of my different stand on issues I will understand although I will be disappointed that I won't get to read about what's going on with you.
Robin,
You know that I absolutely am not referring to you:) I know that you read my blog and I always value your input. And, let’s face it, if I could write like you do and reflect theologically as well as you do, I wouldn't have to rant and rave in my blogs, I would have something theological to say like you always do:)
You are so right! We need to hear each other and listen. I certainly don't have to agree with other view points as a matter of fact, I have learned more from listening to others who I disagree with than I ever would listing to people that I agree with.
Here is what frustrates me the most. The greatest complaint that I heard all the time at MTSO about Conservative Christians (which I agree is a very valid criticism) is that they too often come across as knowing all the answers and that if you don't agree with their perspective, whether on baptism, communion, salvation... then you are somehow less of a Christian or perhaps in their eyes not even Christian at all.
What I keep hearing and reading on Facebook is the exact same thing coming from those who are the most critical of Conservative Christians for this behavior. They act like, and sound like, if you don't agree with them or believe the way they do about one issue or another, than you are somehow either dead wrong or hopelessly pathetic.
I have decided that I am just going to let it go. I am not going to argue on Facebook, (Now, I reserve the right to rant a little on my blog from time to time:) And I am going back to just being who I am, lift up the positives, give encouragement where I can, enjoy the posts of the people, like you, that are some of my favorite people on earth and honestly, simply ignore those who are going to use Facebook to promote their own political, ideological and social agendas.
Robin, thanks for caring, thanks for listening and know that I hold you in my prayers all the time as you begin this last year. Remember, that I started this blog one year ago at this time because of the immense stress and pressure I was feeling from the District BOOM, the Commissioning process, the last year of seminary, an upcoming trip to El Salvador... Well you understand:)
Blessings to you my friend:)
Nancy,
You are the one that I owe the apology to the most. Although you are right that we don't always agree, you and I have always been able to talk about things and at least from my perspective, and I hope from yours, that our disagreements have always been respectful and usually fruitful for me. And, trust me, when I talk about learning from others you are very high on that list:)
The reason that I mostly owe you the apology is because, you were the one that I responded to, in anger. In reality, you just happened to be the last in a long string of posts and I took it out and vented on you, and for that I am very sorry!
You caught me at the end of a long difficult week and I should not have taken it out on you.
If it is any consolation perhaps the reason that I vented to you and not the ones that I probably wanted to vent my frustration to, was because we have always had a good relationship and I knew that you would just consider the source:)
I am not de-friending anyone, and never would I de-friend you:) I learned a long time ago (and was just recently reminded) that friends are much to rare and valuable for that.
Thank-you for being one of those friends!
Blessings:)
Luv ya!
:-)
Thanks, Jim. Glad to be on this journey with you. I very much appreciate your prayers as I begin this last year of seminary and start the commissioning process. I am actually working on some of the paperwork today. Fun, fun!
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