Mixed Emotions

Today is very much a day of mixed emotions. I have completed my last trip to Ohio (except for graduation) and now I have a weeks worth of work to get done today. I really don’t know what to say about being finished with seminary. There is a part of me that is ecstatic. I can’t believe that it is actually finished. As I look back, in one way, these four years have seemed like a lifetime. I almost don’t remember what my life was like prior to seminary. But in an equally puzzling way, it seems like it was only yesterday that I sat in the orientation, thinking that there would be no way possible that I would be able to get through all of the mental, spiritual and emotional challenges standing between me and a Master of Divinity Degree. But none-the-less, here I am!

I had an opportunity to sit down and talk to President Jay Rundell yesterday for about a half hour, and I shared with him my two greatest fears entering seminary. The first was that I wouldn’t be able to keep up with the academic work. It had been 25 years since I had been in school and too be honest, I wasn’t all that great of a student back then. The other fear was that I would be totally out of place with all of those young fresh faced “kids” that I saw walking around on campus. But, four years later, I look back and see that both of those fears were unfounded. I will graduate with a grade point average just above a 3.5 which is an A, and I now realize that the interaction that I had with all of those young (and not so young) students will be what I will forever cherish most about my time in seminary.

My guess is that you will hear more of these reflections over the next several days. I am only now beginning to process what this experience has meant to me, so as I figure it out I will let you know.

Oh, and as for my tooth, I have only had a few times where I was pretty miserable, but for the most part the discomfort has stayed to a low consistent aggravation. Today I have to pack in a weeks worth of work because tomorrow morning I have to get that tooth pulled, and I am a little concerned about how well I will feel when I get done. Maybe, I will feel fine and I can get right back to work, I certainly have enough that needs to get done. But if not, Sunday’s sermon may become a hymn sing, led by somone else :)

Blessings

Where Have You Been???

I have to apologize, this is about as long as I have ever gone without posting on my blog. This has been an incredibly busy last few days as I have been trying to get everything done for school as well as plan for our Mothers Day Banquet and prepare for the special services last Sunday for Mothers Day. In addition, I developed a pretty significant pain in one of my teeth and ended up going to the dentist on Friday. After examining me, the dentist told me that he would have to pull the tooth which didn’t make me especially happy. They sent me home with some pain medication and antibiotics and said that they would try to get me back in on Saturday to pull it. Late Saturday morning they finally called, but by then I was full blown into trying to get ready for the Mothers Day Banquet, and besides the pain had calmed down to a mild roar, so I hoped to put off the pain of getting it pulled a little longer.

So this morning I called back to get my appointment scheduled and I decided that I would try to make it until Friday. I figured, today, I would finish my final paper for Evangelism, tomorrow and Wednesday I will be in Ohio and I hope to get the majority of my final Ethics paper finished by then. Thursday, I plan to get ready for Sunday services and finish my Ethics paper and then Friday get my tooth pulled. Saturday I can plan to lay around in pain all day (I hope that isn’t the case) and then Sunday preach 2 sermons and then give a presentation to my home church on my trip to El Salvador. I just don’t have time to be down, so if I am going to feel bad, it can only be between the hours of 10:00 AM on Friday and 8:00 AM on Sunday. Now I just hope that the pain medication keeps me going until Friday. I will let you know how that part of my plan works out:)

For now, I am heading to bed, and tomorrow morning I will be on my way to Ohio at 7:15 AM.

Blessings

National Day of Prayer

Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

A Cluttered Mind is a Terrible Thing to Waste...

I am sure that you have heard the expression that a cluttered desk is indicative of a cluttered mind. Well, if that is the case I’m afraid that my mind is ultracluttered. When I got home from Ohio last night, I went into my office and picked up the mail, which is always placed neatly on my office chair, but when I went to put it on my desk, I discovered that there was no longer any place to put it. The stacks have now covered my desk to the point that I only have enough room for my mouse. (Actually the mouse pad is beginning to get shoved off the edge of my desk.) It’s a good thing that my keyboard is in a drawer under my desk, or I wouldn’t be able to type.

So what does it mean that my mind is so cluttered? Is it cluttered with good things, or am I just that woefully behind on everything that has found it’s way to my desk without any hope of being resurrected? Well, today I am going to find out the answer to that question. My goal is to find out what is on the bottom of those stacks and to begin the task of uncluttering my desk.

So, with that in mind, it does force me to ask the obvious question; if my desk gets uncluttered will that mean that my mind won’t be cluttered anymore? I didn’t think so either :)
Blessings

I Have My Work Cut Out For Me...

I have come to a very scary revelation. It is going to take me the next 25 years to even begin to digest and process what I have learned in these past four years of seminary. As I was sitting in my Foucault class this afternoon doing everything that I could to simply keep my mouth shut and not weigh into a conversation that could only end up badly for me. I realized that I can not simply dismiss many of these ideas that I have disagreed with on such a gut level. I don’t think that I will ever reach a point where I am in agreement, but I think that it will be critical for my ministry to try to understand where these ideas have come from and at the very least to understand the needs and desire of the people who express them.

I believe that we are all interconnected. What I do affects you and what you do affects me. No mater how hard I may try to understand some of the ideas that I hear expressed by my colleagues, I can’t get past this basic idea that we are all a part of something much bigger and if I do something harmful to myself or to my relationships with others, those actions will have a ripple effect that will impact many more people and ultimately society.

Take a popular television program like The Bachelor for instance. It could be argued that it is just a television show, and that it is simply a form of entertainment, but I can’t help but see the way that it denigrates the relationship between two people and reduces love, commitment and ultimately marriage to the level of a game show. I struggle to see how this could possibly have any form of positive impact on society. But then I have to step back and ask the question, how did we get here? Was a program like The Dating Game that I watched as a child preparing our society to accept a program like The Bachelor? If so, what will be the next step beyond The Bachelor? I mean the divorce rate is already above 50%, how much worse can it get? Do we ultimately do away with marriage all together?

Are we reaching a point in society where our relationships with each other are becoming so shallow that we will allow "America" to vote online and decide who we should pick to “hook-up” with? Perhaps that will be the next generation of Facebook, “Pick the top 5 girls/guys I should be with.” Notice I didn’t say marry, I’m really afraid that marriage itself may be a dying institution. This whole idea of Facebook just seems to keep people at a distance. Oh sure I know what time people get up, what they had for breakfast, and what they are doing today, but that just gives me the illusion that I know them, I am only learning what they want me to know which may give the impression that I know them, but the reality is often quite different.

I am very concerned about our ability to really connect with each other on a deep personal level. In my lifetime I have seen a tremendous change in how we define a traditional family, marriage and personal relationships. These changes, I believe, will only become more and more profound in the foreseeable future. How do we respond to these changes? How do we as a society negotiate this new world? How do we mourn the loss of these things that we have held so dear while seeking to look forward and embrace the future? I think that I will definitely have my work cut out for me over the next 25 years figuring this all out.

Blessings

A Month to Remember...

This week marks the beginning of a very hectic month. I have 19 more days remaining until graduation, but only 9 more days left until my last class and the completion of all of my course work. This Saturday is our Mother Daughter Banquet at church and Karen and I will be doing most all of the preparations for that, although we are very much looking forward to it. I have arranged to have a guest speaker come and talk to the ladies, which I am very anxious to hear. I won’t say who she is, but I have wanted to have this conversation in the church since I was appointed to Crothersville/Cana four years ago, so I hope that it will be a blessing to everyone.

On Sunday the 17th I have been invited to go to my home church, Trinity, and give a presentation on my trip to El Salvador, so I am looking forward to seeing everyone again and to especially have the chance to thank them for their significant role in my being able to complete seminary.

Then, of course, the following Friday, I will be journeying back over to MTSO for Friday’s graduation rehearsal as well as the Baccalaureate Service Friday evening. All of the kids are planning to come as well, and we will be staying over night and then attending the graduation festivities on Saturday morning. I think that this will be a time of mixed emotions. I have been though graduations a few times now and I know that this will be the last time that I see some of these people, so that will make for a bit of sadness in what will otherwise be a wonderful day.

Sunday the kids are planning a party for me between 4:00 and 6:00 PM at the Fellowship Hall of Crothersville UMC. Everyone is invited:) And I am looking forward to having an opportunity to thank all of the people who have been so instrumental in my ministry.

Monday afternoon following graduation, I then leave for 3 days to begin the RIM, Residence in Ministry Program, which will be the program that will keep me busy over the next 3 years as I continue down the path to Ordination. I have no idea yet where I will be spending those 3 days or what we will be doing, but for now, I am just grateful to be on the list, so I will just do what the Bishop and Board of Ordained Ministry tells me to do.

So that is pretty much my month of May. I am sure that there are surprises and a lot of unexpected things that will be happening this month. But regardless, it will certainly go down as a month to remember!

Blessings

May is a Memorable Month!

The month of May has always been a memorable month throughout my life. There have been some pretty great and memorable events such as graduations, concerts, recitals and a number of other things that will forever be a part of who I am. The awesome thing is that there are several events coming up for me in the next few weeks that are sure to add to the treasure trove of memories that I already have in the month of May.

But as I sit here this evening, the night before the Kentucky Derby (which is a big event around here) I can’t help but think about what happened in my family exactly 36 years ago tonight. This was the night of the annual talent program at my High School in Moline, Illinois, although I was still in Junior High at the time. My sister, who was three years ahead of me in school had tickets that she had received from a good friend of hers (who I wasn’t quite sure could be trusted) and for some reason, I was elected to go with her to the program. I could tell you that I didn’t want to go, and that I was dragged kicking and screaming, but, to be quite honest, after all these years I couldn’t tell you if I wanted to go or not. All I knew is that we were there.

Sometime in the middle of the program, there was an announcement made over the PA system for Jim and Verna Higdon to come to the ticket counter. I was immediately angry, I was just positive that there must have been some type of problem with the tickets that her friend had given her, and that we were being kicked out of the program.

However, when we arrived at the ticket counter our parents were there to pick us up, apparently my brother, who was 20 years older than me and living in Atlanta, had been on his way up to visit us on his motorcycle when it broke down on him in Louisville, KY. That’s correct, on the night before the Kentucky Derby. (I still had my doubts about the validity of our tickets)

So we all jumped into our van and began the almost 8 hour trip to Louisville to pick him up. Dad drove all night, and just as the sun was dawning on Kentucky Derby day, we arrived in Louisville to find my brother camped out behind a filling station, all ready to load up his bike in the back of the van and head for home.

That night has been a memory that has stuck with me all of these years and other than my concerns about whether or not our tickets were valid (do you get the feeling that this could still be an issue for me?) This was, for me, an excellent example of our families care and concern for each other. My parents never hesitated, they didn’t argue, they didn’t debate the various options that they had available, they simply did what they had to do to take care of one of their kids, even though my brother was a really old man of 35 at the time :) As I reflect back on that experience, I will always remember the love that my parents had for each of us and their willingness to sacrifice for us without hesitation.

This is also a reminder to me of the love that God has for each of his children. For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. I am indeed blessed!